Cow Corner

Cow Corner: Beef Jerky

Cow Corner

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Great players don't make great coaches, they certainly don't make great pundits.

Clive Lloyd was a legend but his monosyllabic stints in the commentary box have seen him consigned to the home of the non orator, the ICC match referees room, while in my opinion Viv Richards should stop using 'in my opinion' before every sentence.

While some pundits are just plain bias - Richard Hadlee, Sunil Gavaskar and Aamir Sohail being the second, third and fourth worst culprits.

But who is the worst you cry. It must be Sir (as he is legally obliged to be referred to at least nine times a day) Ian Botham.

A typically bullish Botham was up to his old tricks when he piped up that England will regain the Ashes on home soil next year......comfortably.

"I predicted it in 2005 and I predict it again. We have the bowlers - the one thing Australia are lacking. They have Brett Lee. But after that, there's nothing; there's no spinner and no Glenn McGrath. There's no threat. If the bowlers stay fit I think we will win the series." he opined ignoring the fact that England got stuffed 5-0 Down Under 22 months ago.

There were no Lee or McGrath when Australia won the Ashes in 1989 or in 1991 and according to Botham it seems the other nine blokes in Baggy Green caps were just there for the cans of VB when they won in 1993, 1995, 1997, 1999, 2001 and 2003.

So just before you race down to the satchel swingers to put the recently found savings on your tracker mortgage on a 5-0 England whitewash, let's have a look some other Beefy predictions.


Beefy: "We have a real chance of going all the way in the Caribbean."
Result: England are thrashed by South Africa and fail to get past the Super Eight stage of the World Cup.


Beefy: "Colly has a good cricket brain, captaincy will not bring any major upheavals or disruption to his life."
Result: Paul Collingwood relinquishes charge of the ODI team after only 24 games because it was affecting his ability to enjoy the game.


Beefy: "Depleted attack or not, England have the firepower to beat India at home."
Result: India win the series 1-0


Beefy: "At last we've got a one-day team that looks the part and can set pulses racing with their new brand of cricket."
Result: England win five of their next 16 one-day internationals.

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