Cow Corner

I fought the law and the law changed

Cow Corner

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Normally when you fight the law, the law wins. But in cricket when you fight the law, the law changes.

The International Cricket Council have moved swiftly - going against the rules set down in Bobby Fuller's 1965 ditty - by giving umpires the power to reduce the length of the interval between innings.

It's all in an effort to avoid a repeat of the farcical scenes at the end of England's one-day clash with New Zealand on Wednesday, now known as 'logic bypass gate' by observes and 'a right bleeding balls-up' by those folk who forked out 50 notes for a ticket.

With the ICC now open to changes at the drop of a wide Richie Richardson brimmed sunhat, here's a few more suggestions for some cricketing rule changes:

- Ban Ian Botham, Viv Richards, Clive Lloyd, Aamir Sohail and Waqar Younis from all Test venues around the world. Great players, don't make great commentators - you don't get Al Pacino reviewing films do you? Sohail is so bias to one side, he is prone to tipping over in the com box.

- Turn up the stump mics so we can actually hear what Matthew Hayden and co are chirping. The ICC will distribute ear muffs playing light soothing Kenny-G for youngsters, the infirm and those who take offence to the term 'mongrel' being used every other ball.

- Only allow West Indies to play matches at home. They are ok in their own back yardie but are dreadful in any location where "Ting" is not the national drink of choice.
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The ICC are also considering a Test championship to ensure that, amid the increasing popularity of 'pop and crisps' Twenty20, "a special place is maintained for Test cricket in the calendar."

Cowers usually reserves that special place in his calendar for Holly Valance but applauds the stance of the cheeses in Dubai.

They are chewing the fat on a number of options - championship or league; one year, two year or four year duration for the matches included; neutral venue etc etc

Could it be the return of the timeless Test with players having to abandon the match on day nine because Easyjet have cancelled their scheduled route from Sharjah to Birmingham International.

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QUOTE OF THE DAY: "I am relieved to have returned to my country," Pakistani paceman Mohammad Asif at Lahore international airport after he leaves Grooverider alone in a Dubai prison cell.

FEEDBACK OF THE DAY: "I always remember when playing as England on the classic Playstation 1 game "Brian Lara Cricket" Whenever the Hickster came in i was pretty much guaranteed a 50. It was the same with Mark Butcher," the_kop2003 reminds us that there are always people sadder than yourself out there.


TALKING POINT: Change a cricket rule - go on it's Friday, let yourself go.

TODAY: Nine more games in the Twenty20 Cup from 5.30pm and Freddie might be playing.

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