There are occasional success stories - Martina Hingis, Led Zeppelin, Jesus and the 1970s to name a few - but generally the rule is that 'if it ain't broke, don't fix it' (unless of course you've made some poor business decisions, been rinsed by a former lover or developed an expensive drug habit, resulting in complete desperation and the abandonment of any scruples that may once have existed).
Why? It's simple really - so as not to run the risk of ruining any of the fond memories your fans may hold. Early Doors can no longer bear to watch the first Superman film or listen to Ice Ice Baby without breaking out in a glacial sweat at the thought of what may follow.
Thierry Henry has the right idea. The Frenchman has been touted for a move back to the Premier League after suffering a few teething problems over in Barcelona, but he has stated he has absolutely no intention of doing so.
And rightly so. Henry has already succeeded in England and we all remember him fondly for what he brought to these shores. Even the arrogance he displayed as his time at Arsenal drew to a close is now fading into a distant memory.
His daughter aside, there are few reasons for Henry to return to England - he has already been there and done that and quite possibly bought the designer tee-shirt too, so why run the risk of spoiling all that by making a comeback?
Of course, ED could be giving Henry a little too much credit here. It was, after all, Manchester City who were touted as a possible destination - surely enough to scare anyone off.
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ED is well aware that Bill Shankly once said "football is not a matter of life and death - it's more important than that", but surely he was just having a laugh and only came out with it because it sounded funny.
It seems, however, that some people do believe in that mentality, not least those who have to sell the product of football, and from here on in until the end of the season, every big game is sure to be billed as a do-or-die clash.
Take tonight's match between Manchester United and Bolton for example. If today's papers - The Sun in particular - are to be believed, Old Trafford will resemble a war zone later on.
"We can fight dirty too, Kev" and "my boys will sort you out" are just two takes on how Alex Ferguson has been preparing his 'troops' for the game as Old Trafford braces itself for a Kevin Davies-induced bloodbath.
Davies is officially the Premier League's dirtiest player of all time and United know all about him after he ruffled a few of Patrice Evra's well-preened feathers at the Reebok earlier on this season.
Alex Ferguson is expecting Davies to "do everything he possibly can" to unsettle United once again, leaving ED, in its role as Eurosport fashion guru, to suggest red as tonight's colour - be that the colour of the referee's cards or the hue of Fergie's face should the official not protect his players quite as well as he would like.
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QUOTE OF THE DAY: "Every time I go to his house, I check it is still there." Rio Ferdinand's mum on whether he still has a Looby Loo doll from kids TV show Andy Pandy. The answer is, sadly, yes. Rio, you've been merked!
FOREIGN VIEW: Thierry Henry might not be up for it, but Diego Forlan wants a move back to the Premier League, according to today's Daily Star. You'd think Roy Keane would have seen enough at Manchester United to put him off Diego for life, but the Sunderland boss is apparently keen on a reunion.
TODAY'S TALKING POINT: The old ones are always the best, as geelte proved yesterday: "Rumour has it that the illusionist David Blaine is p'eed off because Michael Owen has beaten his record of spending 44 days in a box doing absolutely nothing!"
Today's talking point - Who would you like to see make a return to action in the modern English game?
COMING UP: After yesterday's paltry offerings, tonight's bill is a veritable feast of football. Manchester United can move three points clear at the top of the table with victory over Bolton and if Chelsea beat Spurs 5-0, they'll take second place off Arsenal. So, all in all quite a bumper evening of football ahead (five goals at White Hart Lane not guaranteed). Catch live text commentary on both games tonight on eurosport.yahoo.com. Oh, we'll have some of that Serie A stuff for you too. Happy days.
- Thierry Henry
- Manchester United