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  • Robert M Robert M Apr 27, 2008 18:41 Flag

    Those who lost the plot

    On a hot day with some hot tempers, it wasn't quite the Battle of the Bridge, but it became increasingly tense and chaotic as time went on. This is my list of those who lost the plot yesterday, in chronological rather than seriousness order:

    1. After a fairly calm first half, it was set off ten minutes after half-time by Ricardo Carvalho. Usually Chelsea's most dependable defender, for no known reason he decided to gift Man U a goal with the perfect through pass for the goal-hanging Rooney. Rooney shook off the pain in his balls for a few seconds to squeeze one in the corner, if you know what I mean.

    2. Realising that silly time had come, a Man U supporter who had been lurking near me in the East stand (home fans), jumped up and celebrated United’s goal. This got him and his girfriend summarily evicted by the stewards.

    3. Whilst he was being led away a Chelsea fan who looked like he never had a plot to lose in the first place showed him which way to go with a helpful punch in the face. This got the Chelsea fan evicted too (and hopefully banned for life).

    4. There was a slight plot-loss when several Chelsea players surrounded the referee to whinge about something after about 70 minutes. Sky commentary tut-tuts about Chelsea players having a reputation of doing this.

    5. 72 minutes and Drogba has definitely lost it. A Chelsea free kick just outside the Man U area and Droga and Ballack have a tug of war over the ball. It’s mine. No, it’s my turn. I’m telling mummy on you. Drogba takes it and it’s going in the top corner – yeeeeaaaaahhhhhh – oooooooohhh – Van der Saar came from nowhere and saved it. Turned out on the TV replay VDS had been hiding behind the wall and only had to jump two feet. Very unsporting.

    6. Man U players start to boil over and surround the referee in a most Chelsea like way. Sky commentary doesn’t notice.

    7. When someone gets injured and the players have a water break Drogba continues his tantrum on the touchline, moaning to Steve Clarke about that nasty German who wants to take the free kicks.

    8. 86 minutes, penalty to Chelsea! Chelsea crowd go wild. Not to be outdone, Man U players and management go wilder. Mass surrounding of referee by Man U players. Referee disappers for several minutes under a sea of red. Fergie comes close to a coronary. Sky commentary don’t see anything wrong with all the complaining but conclude it was a penalty. The nasty German picks up the ball and holds on to it so that he’s definitely getting his turn. He seems to have found everyone else’s plots and smacks the ball cleanly into the net. YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!

    9. Down at the other end, first Cole and then Shevchenko (who?) clear the ball off the line. Ref blows for a free kick to Chelsea in the box and Ferdinand throws away the plot, his marbles and all his toys to have a go at the referee. To be fair, he’d been whingeing and moaning at the ref all afternoon. (Giggs had been too but he’s a nice boy so I’ll leave him out of it.) Ferdinand has to be restrained by several Chelsea players before getting a yellow card. Hargreaves appears and does his best Here’s Johnny impression from The Shining. He gets booked too.

    10. Final whistle. YYYEEEEAAAAHHHHH. That’s the end of it. Not quite. Ferdinand walks downs tunnel, aims a kick at the wall and connects with a female steward. Well, who would expect an England centre-half to be able to kick something as small as a wall? Come on, be reasonable.

    11. Fergie and that nice Mr Queeraz continue their season long rant about refereees giving decisions against them and demand sackings. Good deflection from their poor team selection and being outplayed.

    12. And finally, a bunch of Chelsea officials and stewards have a fight with Patrice Evra and Getoffthe Park. Punches are thrown, tongues are stuck out.

    Where’s the pizza?


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    • i think you will find glitch that one of there stewards threw a punch at evra and will most likely be sacked and he had to be restrained so wait for the full facts before you pass judgement. its all speculation at the moment and only chelsea are talking as united have no evidence so far. im sure roman will push to have 8 of our players banned for the wigan game because we run across his pitch or in a goalmouth, with a bribe or 2 so he can BUY the league for real, probably ordered the groundstaff to wind us up but something was said and the rest as i say is he says she says. we will know soon enough

    • Oh, well if the Chelseas staff say it didn't happen, then case closed, Evra probably had a gun tucked in his shorts, and it was purely self-defence.

      We are talking about a club that used to be pretty much second to Millwall in terms of race-relations here, so it can't be a surprise to anyone that this accusation has come up.

    • Where did you hear that slayer?Where you there then?Chelsea fan now are you?

    • Chelsea have interviewed their staff and there is no suggestion of racial abuse.

      Evra should be docked a couple of weeks wages and everyone get back to their gardening and football.

    • The Sky commentators did comment on United players barracking the ref, but it's understandable in such a big match, especially when the ref seemed to give a free kick Chelsea's way for no reason other than to alleviate the pressure in their box. I'm not condoning it, neither did Andy "he hates United anyway" Gray, I'm just understanding it.

      You also missed out the fact that Ferdinand has made up for his unfortunate behaviour post-match: http://www.manutd.com/default.sps?pagegid={B4CEE8FA-9A47-47BC-B069-3F7A2F35DB70}&newsid=549800

      It was disappointing to see Queiroz doing a Wenger in the post-match interviews, even though I don't know about that penalty either, TBH. From the slow-mo replays, you can't tell whether it hit an arm, a leg or a chest, so how the linesman was so sure I'll never know. The fact is if we'd have played well in the first half and put the right players on the pitch from the start, it would have made all the difference, but we didn't so there's no point blaming someone else.

      Lastly, what exactly was the deal with this "warm-down incident"? Some of the players taking part had been sat behind the bench wearing suits during the game, and did not take any part in the match, why were they "warming down" at all?

      • 2 Replies to Tim
      • On the "warm down", yes, Neville and Scholes had taken no part in the match beyond wandering about the pitch in business suits for twenty minutes an hour before it started. Somewhere I read it was less a "warm-down" for the subs and more a "full-blown training session". Can't imagine why.

        I don't know what happened but it seems terribly childish, probably from all concerned. You'd think that if Man U wanted to use a part of the pitch for a while they'd ask. If the answer is yes, the Chelsea staff have no business interrupting them. But if they hadn't got permission and Chelsea ground-staff ask them to move on or over then they should.

        Given it happened away from public view you'd think the FA need take no action unless one club made a complaint.

        It's all just handbags, isn't it?


      • Couldn't access the link - blocked by my parental control. Was it a Rio roasting vid?

        Or a statement that he is buying his kicking victim a bunch of flowers. Someone might need to remind Dopey to give them to the woman and not the wall.

        With his dosh he should be paying for her to go to Moscow to watch Barcelona giving the Chavs a thrashing in the CL final.

    • Great post Rob, and fair assesment of everything.

      Dont really know what everyone is complaining about re the pen. It was a pen!

      And shame Rio clouded a great personal performance with his antics after the final whistle. It cannot be condoned. Hargreaves got booked for arguing with the ref so at least that is consistent with what refs are supposed to be doing.

      Looks like it will go down to the wire, nervous two weeks ahead then!!

    • and Robert shouldn't Drogba be banned for his disgraceful behavoir?

      • 2 Replies to A Yahoo! User
      • Which particular disgraceful behaviour do you have in mind? If you mean what I referred to above, no, it's for Chelsea to sort out internally.


      • I havent seen the Evra stuff, but I read something on the train this morning that basically called for Ferdinand to be stripped of the captaincy he doesnt yet have, on the basis of the fracas in the box, which on my one viewing so far didnt look like his fault, and also kicking a wall out of site of camera. If he'd lumped a steward, and a woman at that, in the face then sure, we have an issue. But this is pathetic.
        The same article seemed less bothered with Evra and Neville getting, albeit quite understandably by the sounds of it, pissed off at the groundsmen. It sounds like a particular one of them was up for it, but you just cant do that even in plain clothes, certainly not on camera and on duty.
        Drogba's attitude towards Ballack though was utterly pathetic, perhaps he's been taking lessons from Adebayor and Gallas ?.
        I havent seen the pen other than realtime, but you win some and you lose some. I cant complain at the result, but then if there hadnt been a pen given neither could chelsea if it had been a draw.
        The points at ewood and riverside now seem bigger than ever, but we are still stuck in "win the next one and you win the lot" mode. It's just we've only one chance left.
        Come on ye reds!.

    • there is a league table that shows if decisions that mattered were given where the teams would be. funny that we would actually be further in front. but avram says its the ref fault so be it, anything to save him his job. whoever wins the prem deserves it, over 38 games it evens itself out and should you pip us, you will deserve it, should we pip you, well, we wont because we are not allowed to, its won by refs, cheating, biased, etc etc............but never deserved.

    • fair point rob and this all took place during and after the game, including fergies whinge. your man grant is still whinging about an incident in september when we beat you and says if we win the title that ref won it for us. so i can take it the ref v blackburn that didnt give the penalty for as blatant a handball as carricks, will be to blame should you win it.