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Sorry ‘Geordie Girl’ your latest piece of rubbish has been held in an ‘ABU Queue.’
Press 1 – If you hate yourself.
Press 2 – If you want to be taught how a football forum works.
Press 3 – If you require some more anger management.
Press 4 – If you just feel insecure and just want to cry in your dirty bedsit.
Press 5 – If you want to be torn a new one again by any one of many posters on this board.
Press 6 – To upgrade your posting status to ‘Sandgrounder’.
Press 7 – To contact ChildLine and chat with a counsellor.
Press 8 – If you wish to discontinue being a ‘Keyboard Warrior’.
Press 9 – To get help with your obsession and hatred of Manchester United.
Press 10 – If you want to call for some more ABU backup.
Press 11 – If the dribble from your mouth is dripping on your keyboard.
Press 12 – To stop being tormented on this board.