Newcastle United Message Board
The anarchic town of Middlesbrough was brought to a standstill when a car with a valid road tax disc was reported in the centre. Word of the vehicle quickly spread around amongst Smoggie inhabitants along with rumours that royalty had descended on the city. Baying mobs gathered round the vehicle clawing at the cars paintwork and hungrily pressing their faces against the windscreen and windows terrifying the unfortunate occupants of the car. The car had apparently mistakenly strayed from the A19. The elderly couple later told reporters that they were on their way from Yorkshire to Newcastle to see the Christmas Festival lights when the woman Edith Mould said she need the loo - her husband saw a road sign which said TOILET and they ended up in Middlesbrough. When police arrived on the scene they dispersed the crowd by handing out bars of munchies and Woodbines. After the police negotiated a deal with local mobsters, they were able to lift the now wheel-less car and its occupants onto a flat bed trailer and drive them out of the municipality.
Middlesboro Police Chief Arthur Bonkers said “Car Tax, TV Licences and driving licences are not one of the priorities in trying to maintain rule in this f*****g place and the arrival of this car had understandably caused shock amongst the inhabitants which was something akin to a UFO sighting”. He added “ he would like to thank local mobsters and in particular mob boss Louis Spewzoni for their assistance in securing the release of this vehicle” , reportedly in exchange for concessions on other aspects of law in the Boro.
Speaking on the condition of anonymity from his plush mansion in the midlands Gareth Southgate said: “Up there a tax disc is about as rare as travelling Middlesboro supporters”
I am an Australian who has spent much time in the Ashington/Bedlington area. I went to Middlesboro some years ago to buy a second hand car (which was not registered). I couldn't find the street so I pulled in to a service station to ask for directions. I spent a considerable time looking for what I thought was a greek club called the "Sapartis" club from which the street I was looking for ran from. It wasn't until much later that I realised they were talking about Middlesboro FC SUPPORTERS club which I had obliviously driven past half a dozen times. Just a recollection.
- 1 Reply to niceguyolder
The Sapartis" club was probably a 1 room house with 2 white plastic chairs and a milk crate
years ago I stopped off at a little chef cafe in middlesbrough for some breakfast and there was a sign near my table which said WATCH YOUR BELONGINGS. I was watching them and somebody stole my bacon and eggs