German Grand Prix: Nein, nein, nein, Nico

Well, the guys on the podium were happy enough to drink champagne from a stinky shoe (Daniel Ricciardo necking a foot of fizzy rather than a yard of ale, pictured) but this race was really all about the ones who didn’t make the top three.

As F1 goes into its long, much-needed, summer break, it’s quite clear who has emerged victorious in the first part of the season.

And it’s quite clear who is in deep do-do…

How to lose a championship

Nico Rosberg (pictured) can’t blame anyone but himself for throwing this race away. Sitting on pole, we all knew how important that first corner would be.

But he spun up his tyres at the start, slipped back to fourth place and couldn’t find a way back.

The tussle between Rosberg and Ricciardo during the opening laps was great entertainment and it was also significant to see the Red Bull giving as good as it got in a head-to-head battle.

The combination of Mercedes and Rosberg simply wasn’t good enough in the opening phase of this race. Then…

Lap 29, Rosberg dives down the inside of Verstappen, Verstappen is squeezed off the track, Rosberg gets a five-second penalty.

To be fair to Rosberg, the move was borderline acceptable, even if he did wait an inordinately long time before turning in; I’m willing to bet that Verstappen would have backed out if that run-off area had been filled with gravel rather than concrete.

No matter – Rosberg’s bad start put him in this position and, because of that, Rosberg gambled on an aggressive pass and lost.

Mercedes really rubbed salt in Nico’s wounds by accidentally extending his five-second pit-stop penalty to more than eight seconds… a delay that may have cost Rosberg a place on the podium, if not glory.

I don’t think this is the race that cost Nico his title – that one was back in Austria, when Nico lost the plot eight corners from the end – but it definitely cost him a relaxing mid-season break.

At one point this year, he led Hamilton by 43points, now he is 19 points behind, and that is going to play on his mind, no matter how hard he tries to relax over the next few weeks.

How to lose a second place

Ferrari’s masterclass in confusion continues to amaze and bemuse the world of F1.

They weren’t the only team to struggle with strategy in Germany but they were the team that struggled most publically.

On lap 44, Vettel was told to box for new tyres. But Vettel had different ideas, and replied: ‘Negative, negative. I’m going to take a couple of more laps, tyres are still good.’

Now, an F1 driver is in the best position to tell how well his tyres are performing. But the decision to pit is not just about tyre wear – it’s about reacting to or prompting other teams’ actions; it’s about getting a car in and out of the pits into an advantageous track position.

It’s about a team of strategists having information that can turn a race around… if the driver listens to them.

Vettel may have been right, the strategists may have been right, it doesn’t matter. The next lap, Vettel was told to stay out and the whole world knew that Ferrari had no idea who was in charge of race strategy.

This is the race where Ferrari slipped into third place in the Constructors’ Championship – and this is a team that has been told it has to get back to winning ways or there will be trouble.

I think it’s fair to say that, after the German result, it’s squeaky bum summer in Maranello.

How to play the team game

Team performance of the day was certainly from Red Bull. With Daniel Ricciardo and Max Verstappen on different tyre strategies, the team knew there might come a point where the driver in front wasn’t the driver with the best chance.

Unfortunately for Verstappen, he was the one on the weaker strategy – as early as lap 21, Max told his team that his supersoft tyre was ‘Not a race tyre’ at that point.

Indeed, the red-coloured supersofts were causing problems for other teams too and Max’s race was already being compromised.

On lap 40, Ricciardo sailed past him in what looked like a choreographed move, setting himself up for a second-place finish and Verstappen for a third.

There were no driver histrionics over the Red Bull move and the team will be more than happy with two drivers on the podium – and elated to be going into the summer break ahead of Ferrari.

Welcome back radio, we’ve missed you

As teams struggled with tyre strategies, it was a blessing to be able to hear drivers and pit walls communicating properly again.

From Vettel’s discussion about who his Ferrari bosses thought he was actually racing (answer, somewhat surprisingly, was Verstappen, a distant eight seconds up the road) to Alonso’s cool analysis after being congratulated on an overtake (I’ll lose a position at the next stop but I will recover), the broadcasts added a layer of insight that has been sorely missed thanks to the radio restrictions of late.

The best radio comment of the day came from Daniel Ricciardo, as he struggled to get past back-marker Esteban Gutierrez (pictured), who is getting a reputation for being a somewhat tricky chap to lap: ‘Esteban is my favourite. I love this guy…’. That’ll be laconic, then.

Red Bull told Ricciardo that he wasn’t being picked on – Gutierrez was doing the same to everyone. But we all knew what Dan meant.

McLaren, is that you?

Yes, both McLarens were in the top ten for most of the race, despite being hampered by their thirsty Honda engines.

Alas, Button and Alonso had to save fuel and, in the end, the Spaniard could finish only 12^th.

But Button brought his machine home in eighth, for some sorely-needed points, despite warning the team that things were getting ‘tricky’ on lap 57.

It’s slow, slow progress that McLaren are making but it is, at least, progress. Given the choice, I’d take McLaren’s slow upward progress from the bowels of the Constructors’ Championship over Ferrari’s depressing slip towards the stomach.

Actually, given the choice, I’d probably use a different metaphor… but you get the picture. Apologies to those of a sensitive disposition, and enjoy the summer break.