The problem with selling players for lots of money in modern football is that modern football clubs often have so much money that an extra £100m isn’t going to touch the sides of their gargantuan wealth – it’s just more cash to sling onto the pile. That’s why it will never make any sense for a club like Chelsea to sell Eden Hazard, no matter how much dosh they are offered for him.

But what about if they swap him?

Today’s papers present a couple of potentially interesting part-exchange deals for the Blues that could make losing their stay player slightly less horrible.

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The Daily Star Sunday – which remains Britain’s stupidest newspaper name – says Chelsea will respond to Manchester City’s interest in Hazard by demanding Sergio Aguero in return.

City have been linked with a £150m move for the Belgian playmaker, but Roman Abramovich would reportedly only sanction that transfer if Aguero was part of the deal.

The Argentine sriker is apparently “highly regarded at Stamford Bridge”. Is there anywhere he isn’t highly regarded?

Unfortunately, City will not allow Aguero to move to Chelsea and therefore Abramovich would not sell them Hazard, so it “looks like mission impossible”. In other words this story was all a big waste of time – sorry.

Chelsea offered Bale for Hazard

Luckily, there is another tantalising swap option on the table for Chelsea coming from Real Madrid. The Sunday Express says the struggling European champions are set to offer the Blues £100m plus Gareth Bale in exchange for Hazard.

The Welshman’s hopes of moving to long-term admirers Manchester United appear to have been ended by Alexis Sanchez’s arrival at Old Trafford, which has “left the way clear” for Chelsea to sign him.

With Hazard continuing to stall on a new Stamford Bridge contract, the alleged feeling in west London is that he wants to move to the Bernabeu anyway so they may as well get one of Real’s Galacticos in return. An injury-prone Welsh Galactico, but still a Galactico.

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Bale ‘s former club Tottenham actually have first refusal on signing him, but he will be too expensive for their tastes so they are shopping in Watford instead.

The Sun on Sunday says Spurs are plotting a £50m double raid to sign Hornets stars Richarlison and Abdoulaye Doucoure in the summer.

Both players would get “huge wage hikes” by moving to the Lilywhites. Then, if they ever get good, in a couple of years they can start moaning that the wages Spurs pay are too low.

Elsewhere, Man City are keen on Borussia Dortmund’s £40m-rated midfielder Julian Weigl (Sunday Mirror), Chelsea will attempt to swap on-loan Dortmund striker Michy Batshuayi for the German side’s winger Christian Pulisic (Mail on Sunday) and Man Utd manager Jose Mourinho reportedly had a “huge dressing room row” with Paul Pogba and Phil Jones following last weekend’s defeat by Newcastle (Sun on Sunday). It would be nice if Pogba and Jones formed an unlikely bromance in the wake of this stressful incident.