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Ohio rejects petition for Browns, Bengals fans to access medical marijuana

Browns and Bengals fans in Ohio won't find legal relief from their frustrations via marijuana. (Getty)
Browns and Bengals fans in Ohio won't find legal relief from their frustrations via marijuana. (Getty)

Disgruntled Ohio football fans will have to go without their weed.

Who are we kidding? They’ll just find another source.

But fans of the Cleveland Browns and Cincinnati Bengals hoping to tamp their football frustration via legal marijuana are out of luck.

Board says no medical marijuana petition

A state board in Ohio that determines who is and isn’t allowed to legally smoke marijuana based on their judgments of the drug’s ability to treat ailments has rejected being a Browns or Bengals fan as a medical need.

Yes, this was a thing.

A fan submitted a petition in December to the state medical board listing “Bengals/Browns Fans” as a condition that could be alleviated by the use of medical marijuana.

No, this decision shouldn’t come as a surprise.

According to the Cincinnati Enquirer, the board also rejected depression, insomnia and opioid use disorder as justifications for medical marijuana use. The board saw fit to keep opioid addicts from finding legal relief via marijuana. Being a fan of bad football wasn’t going to make the cut.

What did qualify?

What conditions are being considered for approval? Anxiety, autism spectrum disorder and a wasting disease marked by extreme weight loss called cachexia, according to the Enquirer.

HIV, AIDS and chronic pain are among the conditions already approved for medical marijuana use in the state.

Medical marijuana was approved in Ohio in 2016.

But until and if Ohio joins the ranks of states embracing legal recreational weed, suffering Browns and Bengals fans will have to resort to other avenues to sooth their ails.

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