8 Players Who You'd Never Believe Were Actually Footballers Based on the Way They Look

Footballers are increasingly obsessed with their appearance these days, led by the beauty of Olivier Giroud and his magnificent beard. There is no set formula for what a footballer should look like, but there are times when players don't look like they belong on a football pitch. This is not necessarily down to ability but rather their appearance and here are eight players who simply don't look like your classic modern footballer... Jeremy Mathieu is a product of Barcelona's unique recruitment...

Jeremy Mathieu

Jeremy Mathieu is a product of Barcelona's unique recruitment strategy, which evidently involves signing players who look like they should be teaching geography as a substitute teacher.


Coincidentally, Mathieu also plays like a substitute teacher and could not have looked more out of place at Barcelona as he spent three seasons in Spain before leaving on a free transfer.


If teaching doesn't work out Mathieu you can pursue a career as a Tony Hibbert lookalike, if Hibbert was fifty years younger.

Jonjo Shelvey

No hair. A deathly stare. An evil streak. A lack of footballing ability.


The comparisons between Jonjo Shelvey and Lord Voldemort are endless, and ensure that Shelvey absolutely does not look like a footballer.


As a result of his links with the Dark Lord, Shelvey has struggled when in the company of people called Harry and this explains his sending off this weekend as Harry Kane's presence brought out a rashness in poor Shelvey who eventually purposely stepped on Spurs' Dele Alli causing the ref to rightly brandish a red card. 

Aaron Mooy

Aaron Mooy doesn't look like a footballer. He just looks evil really.


While having minimal hair isn't a criteria for appearing on this list, it certainly helps and Mooy certainly has an unnerving quality that perhaps is a deliberate ploy to keep defenders away.


A cross between a Football Manager regen and Patrick Stewart, Mooy has admirably decided to fight against the rampant preening of modern footballers.

Gabriel Obertan

Even if some would argue he isn't actually a footballer, Gabriel Obertan certainly doesn't look like your typical Premier League player.


Perhaps the inspiration for both Squidward and Megamind, Obertan's curious combination of facial features means that he has stood out to fans of all clubs.


The fame of being a cartoon villain got too much for Obertan, and he has had to flee to Levski Sofia this summer as Megamind has not yet hit the Bulgarian market.

Samir Nasri

Samir Nasri has pretended to be a footballer for far too long.


Aware from her male football alter ego, Samira Nasri is actually a women's tennis player who has struggled for consistency on the WTA Tour. Too much time has been spent on dying hair and not enough on the practice court.


Samira has changed the country she represents seventeen times in her tennis career, constantly chasing more funding to support her extravagant hair styling.

Raul Meireles

Football appears to be an unwanted distraction from Raul Meireles' true calling of being a tattoo artist.


While using 90% of his hair allowance on his beard has left his head looking a bit barren, he has used his love of tattoos to cover every inch of the rest of his body.


Meireles now looks less like a footballer and more like a hipster style icon, a role that he will surely take on full-time after his retirement.

Thomas McNamara

Thomas McNamara really is living the American Dream as he pursues a career in football despite looking like anything but a footballer.


A cult hero at New York City FC, McNamara may look like Brad Guzan wearing a wig but he is allegedly a dynamic and marauding winger.


Whether it is the hair, the fashion accessories or the physique, McNamara looks nothing like a footballer but miraculously is forging out a successful career for himself.

Charlie Adam

Charlie Adam shouldn't be playing football. He should be offering a random stranger a square go in a dark alley in Dundee.


Using football as an excuse to legally assault other human beings with the subtlety of a hand grenade, Adam has rejected modern football's focus on fitness and athleticism.


His tough style perhaps explains why he's played for clubs such as Rangers, St Mirren, Stoke and Blackpool.

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