Silver Linings! 5 Things Cristiano Could Do on Holiday Following His 5 Match Ban

After all that speculation over the summer about his future, Ronaldo looked to have resolved it all with a superb goal against Barcelona in the Spanish Super Cup first leg. But Ronny was then yellow carded for removing and holding up his shirt in a 'Messi-esque' goal celebration before earning a second yellow for a 'dive'. The drama didn't end there as Ronny decided to do 'a Di Canio' and pushed the referee over following his dismissal. A ban was inevitable. With a lengthy five-game ban...

Actually Sit Down With His Accountant & Sort Out His Tax Affairs

We all know its boring and let’s face it, nobody WANTS to do it, but with a lengthy lay-off on the horizon, this ban provides a golden opportunity to Ronny to put on his reading glasses and sort out his tax return early.


In June, Spanish prosecutors accused Ronaldo of defrauding the Spanish authorities out of a whopping £12.9m in unpaid taxes between 2011 and 2014, with suggestions that Ronaldo had failed to pay a significant amount of tax on revenues relating to his image rights.  

Make a Guest Appearance on Game of Thrones

Fans were undecided about Ed Sheeran’s guest appearance in George R.R. Martin's wildly popular fantasy epic, but there’s no doubt it will do wonders for the singer's global brand. 


A spot in the hit show would be a real coup for the Madrid superstar too, and would diversify his CR7 brand's clientele considerably.


After big screen appearances in sensitive, thoughtful projects such as 'Cristiano Ronaldo: The World at his Feet', 'Ronaldo: Tested to the Limit', and of course 'Ronaldo', the 32-year-old is thought to be looking for roles which show off his full acting range, and 'Thrones' could be just the ticket.


Use the Remaining Two Weeks of the Transfer Window to Angle for a Move or Secure More Money

We all know the story; ‘I’m leaving..’ 

‘What’s it going to take to keep you?’ 

‘More money…’ 

'We'll offer you an improved contract...' 

‘...I’m staying.’ 


Ronaldo voiced his unhappiness at Los Blancos following revelations about his tax affairs and Club President Florentino Perez was reportedly willing to offer the former Sporting Lisbon star far improved terms. 


The Portuguese is currently on a 'measly' £365,000-per-week after tax at the Bernabeu and the club are likely to offer an ungraded deal to the former United star should his grievances with the club continue.  

Hang Out With 'The Donald' at His Trump Tower Apartment

Assuming that Donald J. Trump hasn't unleashed nuclear Armageddon by the time this goes out, Ronaldo could go and stay in the $18.5m Trump Tower loft apartment that he bought in August 2015.


Mr. Trump is known for his hospitality towards wealthy foreign investors and could offer Ronny some much needed advice on keeping tax affairs under completely under wraps. 

Design Some Clothes That Aren't Horrendous

Cristiano Ronaldo launched a brand new fashion website under the CR7 brand, adding a line of shirts to the underwear range he wowed us with last year.


If you like your clothes hair-raisingly tight and your colours primary, look no further, you're in for a sartorial extravaganza. Expect to see his new line of shirts in a TK Maxx near you soon.


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