France’s biggest problem is not really a problem thanks to Didier Deschamps trick

Two of the three players to score for France in Euro 2024 are out of Euro 2024. One no longer plays international football at all. And one single goal from a French player? Well, that was a penalty.

It puts France two games away from an extraordinary achievement: from winning the European Championships without any of their team mustering a goal in open play. It sounds like a feat that the Greece side in 2004 - limited in ability, clean-sheet specialists and set-piece experts - could have pulled off. Not France, who scored four and three in the last two World Cup finals respectively; who have Kylian Mbappe, potentially the best player in the world for the next few years and, in time, the best in the World Cup’s history; who have a galaxy of attacking talent. But maybe it would be the definitive Didier Deschamps triumph, doing so in his own very particular way.

Thus far, his blueprint includes a cocktail of own-goals and a spot kick, stalemate, extra-time and a penalty shootout. Or if not the France manager’s gameplan, a by-product of his safety-first approach. “When you don’t get goals, it is better to not have goals scored against you,” he reflected. “I am a head coach that is defensive so my team plays in defence.” That was tongue in cheek, referencing his reputation.

But even the lone goal from a Frenchman – Mbappe’s strike from 12 yards against Poland – came in a draw. It means France’s two matchwinners to date have not donned Les Bleus’ shirt: Austria’s Max Wober was the first to put the ball in his own net, then Belgium’s Jan Vertonghen, before he called time on his 157-game international career. “We scored one even if it is an own goal,” argued Deschamps.

They all count. France had one curiosity when they won the 2018 World Cup without their main striker, Olivier Giroud, conjuring a shot on target, let alone a goal, in the entire tournament. They won a quarter-final shootout against Portugal when he wanted to bring on Giroud but couldn’t. “The referee didn’t register it soon enough,” he said.

For now, however, France’s impotence is a tale of two talismanic figures who have been below par and a host of gifted others who have made occasional impacts as substitutes, but rather less as starters. Mbappe missed the draw with the Netherlands with the broken nose suffered against Austria. A masked man has concealed his devastating streak; fatigued, he asked to go off against Portugal.

“With everything that has happened, the trouble with his back and the trauma with his nose, he is not in his top form but with his efforts, he felt very tired,” Deschamps said. Then there is Antoine Griezmann, often at his finest in tournament football, but not now. After starting on the bench against Poland and on the right wing against Belgium, he was at least in his preferred position as a No 10 for the Portugal game. He was ineffective. “For various reasons Kylian and Antoine are not playing their best football compared with what they know they can,” Deschamps said. “Despite all of this, we are here.”

Ousmane Dembele, meanwhile, was a bright substitute in the quarter-final, but only after losing his place in the initial 11. Randal Kolo Muani contributed to Vertonghen’s own goal with a catalytic cameo, but was less potent as a starter in Hamburg. Marcus Thuram has played his way out of the side. Kingsley Coman has not been given the opportunity to play his way into it. Bradley Barcola began against Poland; apart from that, he has only been granted 15 minutes of football.

Meanwhile, the defining part of the French team has become Deschamps’ department; the water-carrier, as Eric Cantona disparagingly branded him, has a collection of water-carriers. The French side who won Euro 1984 had their ‘magic square’, the four No 10s who sometimes all played together. Deschamps has gone for three defensive midfielders: with Adrien Rabiot available after suspension and Eduardo Camavinga impressing against Portugal, however, perhaps he will try to cram a quartet of them in.

Even with a mere three, France have conceded a solitary goal, to Poland’s Robert Lewandowski, with a retaken spot-kick after Mike Maignan saved his initial effort. The way Deschamps puts it, they need to be more “efficient” in attack, but they have been remarkably efficient defensively.

Thus far, with their bank of defensive midfielders, France have often lacked attacking width; some of their wingers, in Griezmann and Thuram, have not really been wingers. Deschamps switched to a 4-4-2 diamond against Portugal, with Mbappe and Kolo Muani wider strikers. Whatever the shape, France have neither been creative nor clinical enough.

And yet they are two games from glory. Two Mbappe masterclasses, maybe or two penalty shootouts or two own-goals. “We need to score more goals,” said Deschamps. But perhaps they don’t. Perhaps France can go all the way with own-goals as their top scorer.