Serious question: are there any ways left that Chelsea’s season can get any worse?

Roman Abramovich losing all his money in a casino? John Terry being radicalised online and joining ISIS? Willian contracting a weird disease that makes his feet turn into tiny little top hats? Radamel Falcao’s loan deal being made permanent?

They might all sound ridiculously far-fetched, but then Chelsea fans probably didn’t things could get worse this time on Saturday either, when they were six points behind West Ham in the table and Eden Hazard was being linked with a move to Real Madrid.

Well today, the Blues are nine points behind West Ham in the table and Eden Hazard is being linked with a move to Real Madrid, Barcelona, Manchester City and Manchester United. This is according to the Daily Star Sunday, which reveals it “has been told that Hazard is disappointed and surprised at the way his relationship with Jose Mourinho has changed this season”. Been told by who, we don’t know, but it’s not hard to imagine that the Blues boss has been a bit moody lately. The paper says bidding for the Belgian will start at around £70m, which won’t be much use to Chelsea unless Abramovich really does lose all his money in a casino.

The Sun on Sunday has a slightly different take on things, claiming that Hazard is most likely to move to Paris Saint-Germain, in January, for a fee of £75m. Again, the money will mean nothing to Abramovich, unless that’s the exact cost of an operation to restore Willian’s feet to their original form.

An equally intriguing dollop of transfer gossip appears in the Sunday People, which reports that Jamie Vardy is a January target for Tottenham, who are targeting the Leicester goal machine as a less stroppy (although still quite stroppy) alternative to Saido Berahino.

The Sunday Mirror, meanwhile, suggests that Vardy is a target for new Liverpool boss Jurgen Klopp. Either way, Claudio Ranieri has gone on record saying the Foxes would only sell Vardy for “lots and lots and lots of money”. So if Hazard is worth £75m, the Italian manager will probably be seeking around a billion pounds for the Premier League’s top scorer.

Klopp is also apparently set for “crunch talks” with Mario Balotelli’s agent, which will presumably involve the German seeking assurances that Balotelli is never, ever, ever, ever coming back to Anfield.

In other hot gossip, Everton’s Romelu Lukaku is said to be a target for PSG, Tottenham are being linked once again with £10m-rated Belgian striker Laurent Depoitre and Arsenal are said to be scouting 19-year-old Schalke winger Leroy Sane, described by the People as “Germany’s hottest prospect”, although the Gunners thought the same about Moritz Volz.

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