TALKING BALLONS

When is “last season” last season? Is 2024-25 now “this season”, or is it still “next season”? These are among the blue-sky, big-picture questions being forensically contemplated by this particular tea-timely email, alongside other cheese-based queries like: “Why does Babybel have such a stranglehold on the casual snack-sized cheese market?” And: “How long can Roquefort last without going off?” It’s practically 40% mould anyway! The point is, between the end of Euro 2024, Copa América and Euro 2025 qualifying until the beginning of the domestic league seasons in just under a month from now, there isn’t a whole lot going on right now outside of Big Website’s transfer interactives and possibly some Olympic footy to keep us going. Some people are even turning to cricket and golf to distract them from their day jobs. So, we are forced to rank things, inventing something, anything, to fill the void. Teams of the tournament, six contenders to replace Southgate, who shone and who flopped for England and the 18 best everyday items (No 7: funnels, apparently). All good lists.

But this hiatus of football is also forcing people to consider who might win this year’s Ballon d’Or [easy there, Rio Ferdinand – Football Daily Ed]. Theoretically, this should be a fun exercise, especially as Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo no longer have a monopoly over it. But, rather depressingly, almost all of the favourites to win the male prize play for Real Madrid – Jude Bellingham, Vinícius Júnior, Dani Carvajal and now Kylian Mbappé – who have the enviable/unenviable task of fitting them all into a starting XI this/next season alongside Rodrygo and Endrick. However, despite being born there, the clear winner doesn’t play in Madrid. That choice is, of course, Rodri.

It’s not very $exy for male football to have a defensive midfielder as its best player – the last time that was true was 28 years ago with Matthias Sammer (no, Luka Modric is not a No 6, get a grip) – but that’s the way football is going right now. And nobody can say Rodri doesn’t deserve it. In the past year, he has won the Uefa Super Cup, Club World Cup and a fourth successive Premier League title, plus Euro 2024 (where he won every game and was named player of the tournament). He is the most important player in arguably the best club side in the world. Manchester City’s FA Cup final defeat to United in May ended his 74-game unbeaten streak in all competitions. Just outrageous stats, even if the “Rodri – Right Place, Right Time, Crazy Interceptions – HD 4K” YouTube compilation doesn’t exactly get the pulse racing.

If Real Madrid fans are upset about all that, fear not, you’ll almost certainly sign him soon. Carvajal has spent most of the summer in Rodri’s ear, with the right-back admitting last week: “I tell him: ‘Leave Manchester, there is no sun there, and come to Madrid, we need you. He says he has a contract, that there aren’t release clauses [in England]. He gives me the runaround basically, but he would be the perfect signing, no doubt.” So, just a few more weeks of waiting and then we can enjoy the next transfer debacle and another season being dominated by Real Madrid and Manchester City. Pass the Roquefort.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

“I am at the start of pre-season and am the Tottenham manager, so I have got nothing else [on my mind] but trying to bring success to this football club. Until I do that, there is no point in me thinking about anything else. I had a nap this afternoon, so I have no idea what is going on [it]” – Ange Postecoglou responds to flamin’ reports that the FA is keeping its beady eyes on the Spurs boss over the vacant England gig.

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