The delusional Geordie myth

I’ve been wanting to blog on this subject for a while now but it has never felt the right time. Given the situation Newcastle United find themselves in yet again this season I thought I would put some of my thoughts out there on why the whole notion of a delusional Geordie, in my eyes anyway, simply does not exist.

I am a Geordie, born and bred. I have lived in the area all of my life. I work in Newcastle, I see St James Park on my drive to work every single day. I live and breathe Newcastle United. However, as a Newcastle United fan I can see why the delusional Geordie myth exists. However, I also understand by writing this blog I am not going to influence people in anyway other than to further strengthen people’s views but I’ll give it a whirl anyway!

Straight to the point, here are 4 key reasons why this myth exists.

1. We should be winning all of our games
   

2. We are a big club
   

3. We are the best, most loyal, most passionate fans in the world
   

4. We love a good protest with a mis-spelt slogan on a bed-sheet

5. The Geordie Nation

We should be winning all of our games

What I’ve noticed since I started blogging for Yahoo Sports UK is there seems to be an overriding opinion from people commenting on the blogs (mine and others I have read), Facebook and Twitter that Newcastle United fans seem to believe they have a god given right to win all the time. Lets break this down a little.

So unfortunately no, Newcastle United fans do not believe they have a god given right to win all their games. Most fans, myself included, have never seen us win a major trophy and likely never will. I have seen us get close once and to two FA Cup finals but no silverware and perhaps this “getting close” factor is the issue? I’d like to think we are capable of winning something in the future, I cling on to that hope but in recent times, that hope has been all but removed, more on that later.

During the mid-90s Newcastle United were the team to watch under the management of Kevin Keegan. Under Keegan, we did not win anything but played some magnificent football and got relatively close to winning the Premiership in the 95/96 when we infamously blew a 12 point lead. We came close, but not close enough and whilst other teams “have come close” they tended to back it up with winning the title the subsequent year, or had won the title previously.

Newcastle United really were the media darlings in the 90s. We were branded The Entertainers by Sky and were regularly shown on their live Sunday and Monday games. We were never off the TV; Keegan, Beardsley and Ferdinand playing football with the Honey Monster, Ginola on A Question of Sport, regularly the top pick on Match of the Day; considering we had never won anything, we were shoved down people’s throats. We signed Alan Shearer for a then world record transfer fee of £15m. Like it or not, Newcastle United were big time. Can you imagine a team these days who has only been in the top league for a few seasons; say Swansea City for example, signing the world’s top striker for a modern day transfer record of around £90m? Delusions of grandeur maybe, but that was Newcastle United.

I think this is where a lot of people’s opinions on Newcastle United stem from, in fact I know it is. Are other teams a little jealous of Newcastle United? Possibly. I know during the 90s and 2000s I absolutely hated everything to do with Manchester United; they were in your face all the time, the new media darlings and they actually backed up the hype with lots and lots of shiny trophies. Have I kept that hatred going? Of course I have! Jealousy is what it is. I want to win things, all football fans do. Every single one of you who supports a team wants them to win. Do you expect to win? No! Are you realistic? Yes! But you want to win, end of story.

Newcastle had the success and the glory days without actually winning anything and only really came close on a couple of occasions; this club is nothing in the history of the Premier League other than a great memory for us Newcastle United fans. Do some Newcastle United fans still reminisce and pine for those days? Of course we do, who wouldn’t? Do we expect the replicate that team and relative level of success now? Of course we don’t. We’d like to, but we certainly don’t expect it.

Since those days, Newcastle United has been on a steady decline. We’ve had changes in ownership, more managers than I’d care to guess at and a fairly consistent slide down the table. We’ve had some ups with the late Sir Bobby Robson and, also under Robson, we’ve had some fantastic nights in European football, something a lot of clubs these days could only dream about and we’ve also been dragged through the mud, not only by the current owner but the previous incumbents too.

An image that cropped up last season (and I am playing right in to the hands of the fans who love to see a sobbing Geordie with a bed-sheet in their hands here - although it illustrates point 4 quite nicely) is this one…

This is a very poignant image for me as it sums up my feelings completely in just one sentence. We don’t demand a team that wins, we demand a club that tried and for any Newcastle United fan who has watched the team under Mike Ashley’s guidance over the last 5 years it is 100% spot on. The exposure that a lot of non-Newcastle United supporting football fans receive is to see my club on Match of the Day, or perhaps a game against their own club. What I want to reiterate again is in those games, not one Newcastle United fan I know will expect to win. Yes, there might be some games that are branded as “winnable” but there is never an expectation. What is most disappointing these days is when Newcastle United lose, we lose badly and the attitudes, or lack of, especially teamed with a seemingly lack of heart, desire and passion is there for all magpies fans to see.

We are a big club

Ooooh, now, this is a big one for fans of other clubs. They do not like us lot saying we are a big club. This really gets on your nerves doesn’t it?

Ok, I’ll say it. We are a big club.

We’re a big club, but in no way a successful one. This is key. Can you be a successful club without necessarily being big? No. I think success plays a massive part in making a club big. They get the money, they attract the players, they attract more fans; winning things increases the stature of a club without question.

In my eyes a big club is one competing in the highest league; by doing this you have gained a certain level of success already. Sunderland are a big club. Aston Villa are a big club. Even Bournemouth are a big club. Each have different attributes though and I also think to be a big club you have to have international class players, you have to have some kind of history and most of all, you have to have a big fan base. A big stadium is a bonus but not exactly a defining attribute. It’s fair to say that most Premiership sides could tick most of these boxes, perhaps some only have a small shaky tick, but they can still probably justify themselves as a big club.

Whilst still talking about point 2, I want to also address point 3 here.

We are the best, most loyal, most passionate fans in the world

At Newcastle, we have are fairly consistent 50,000 fans turn up for most matches. Yes, it has gone down by a couple of thousand over the last few years but we’re still right up there with the very best. Does this make us bigger than say Leicester who sit second in the league? I don’t know but I am fairly sure the “big club factor” is low down on Leicester City’s fans’ priorities at the moment. Would the likes of Tottenham, Liverpool and Manchester City have more fans if there ground was bigger? Yes, most likely they would. Would the likes of Leicester, Watford and Aston Villa be able to attract a regular 50,000+ if their ground was extended? No, of course they wouldn’t.

Like it or not, fan base plays a massive part in my eyes as to whether a club is big or not and Newcastle is right up there in the top 4.

I used to regularly hear the chant “Where were you when you were sh*t?” being banged out at St James Park when we were playing well and nearer the other end of the league than we are now. Well, we’re sh*t now and we’re still here.

Are we the most passionate? Well, I commented on my blog a week or so ago that there is absolutely no atmosphere at St James Park any more but then why would there be? We’re watching dross week in week out. What is there to get excited about?

What defines passion? I’d say continuing to go to support the club you love, even when the football on display is awful and morale is at an all time low is a good definition of passion. Some have lost that passion. Most have not.

We love a good protest with a mis-spelt slogan on a bed-sheet

Just a quick one this as I’ve seen the whole bed-sheet brigade term being used a lot with Newcastle United fans recently. My only retort to this is imagine your owner says in no uncertain terms that the level of ambition for your club is mid-table and cup competitions are a no go. Would you like that? What would you say to that? Now, I think I explained myself fairly well in the We should be winning all of our games section above; we don’t expect to win, if anything we expect to lose these days but please don’t take away that slight glimmer of hope that all football fans have; we’d all like to think we could win something, perhaps not the league title but maybe a good cup run? No, at Newcastle United we have been told (until recently) that we won’t be winning anything, cheers for that Mike.

And finally we move on to the last point, the one that really riles me the most.

The Geordie Nation

Can I put the record straight on this one? This does not exist. This has been completely fabricated by the mainly Southern based media. In my 35 years of living in Newcastle I have not used the term used once.

We’re a one city club and, although this term has been used a lot, the city does live and breathe football. Most people in Newcastle are football fans or have a fairly strong family/friend/colleague supporting link to the club. The ground is visible from most areas in the city and the mood is often dictate by the way the club have played at the weekend. Needless to say the mood is low right now!

So, the next time you hear the expression. Please don’t think it is from us lot up Norf - it’s not, I promise you that.

So there you have it. Delusions of grandeur. The delusional Geordie. In my eyes they simply don’t exist. I suppose every club has their “thing” don’t they? Manchester United fans come from London. Manchester City fans supported Chelsea a few seasons ago. Liverpool fans expect to be winning the league every single year. Chelsea fans are all posh oiks. Sunderland fans have 6 fingers on each hand.

They’re all myths mostly.