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HOT FOOTBALL TRANSFER GOSSIP: Lewandowski, Pelle, Bojan, Terry

Once again, the back pages are dominated by rumoured managerial changes that will probably never happen. But we’re going to ignore those and head straight for the rumoured transfers that will probably never happen instead.

Most eye-catching among them is an assertion by German newspaper Bild (click the link if you want but it’s all in shouty German) that Manchester United are prepared to offer Robert Lewandowski £10.1m a year to join them from Bayern Munich. Although that’s less eye-catching when you realise he’d be earning significantly less than Wayne Rooney, and that Real Madrid and Paris Saint-Germain are prepared to offer the Polish striker similar packages. Lewandowski has also gone off the boil lately and is currently on a one-game non-scoring streak.

Italian football media people have made a similarly intriguing claim that Southampton striker Graziano Pelle is being lined up for a move to Chelsea. Which would seem to make perfect sense if we knew who was making the transfer decisions at Stamford Bridge, or who will be.

Young, gifted and reasonably priced, Bojan is the kind of transfer target all the big clubs can get their teeth into - and they are, according to the Sun. Man Utd, Liverpool and Chelsea are all “tracking” the Stoke City midfielder and could apparently offer £15m for him.

Liverpool and United, as well as Everton, are also interested in 18-year-old Swiss sensation Breel Embolo, reports Calcio Mercato. Is it us, or has 18-year-old Swiss sensation Breel Embolo been 18 for longer than a year?

Tottenham are being linked with Michy Batshuayi again, but the difference this time is that the Mirror is saying the Marseille striker will not be available until the summer. Two players who look certain to be available before then are Andros Townsend and Federico Fazio (remember him?), who the Mail reports will be offloaded by Spurs at the next possible opportunity.

Liverpool are also interested in Schalke’s Cameroonian defender Joel Matip (the Express), while John Terry fears he will have to leave Chelsea (the Standard) and Aston Villa manager Remi Garde will be given funds in January to help boost the club’s Championship campaign next season Premier League escape bid (the Independent).

And OK then, due to Hot Football Transfer Gossip’s role as a public service gossip column, we can also give you a brief lowdown on all those manager rumours.

Basically, Jose Mourinho will get the sack if Chelsea can persuade Pep Guardiola, Guus Hiddink or Diego Simeone to join them, which they won’t - at least not until the summer, so Juande Ramos might take over instead. And Guardiola will probably go to Man City anyway and be replaced by Carlo Ancelotti at Bayern. That wasn’t a joke about Juande Ramos, by the way.

@darlingkevin