London’s party pros on how to throw the best party ever — from Jessie Ware to Wolf Gillespie

Hello December! Or, as it might be better regarded, 31 relentless days stuffed with festive soirées and office hangovers. ‘Tis the season!

London’s party pros are nicely limbered already and know how to make your party go with a bang, whether you are hosting a chic dinner party for eight, or an all-nighter for 40. Singer and Table Manners podcaster Jessie Ware shares her tips for feeding a crowd (avoid anything which ties you into serving all night), DJ Joshua James has the ultimate party playlist and Miss Jason shares the rules of being a fabulous guest.

So before you send out the invitations (which must be distributed individually, never via a WhatsApp group), here’s what the experts say. Chin, chin.

Curate the perfect guest list

Aimee Phillips

Remember: just because someone has a big personality, it doesn’t make them a good party guest. You want someone warm, funny and in a funky outfit. My all-time party MVP is Nick Grimshaw. He has incredible stories and will happily give all of his attention to a pop star or someone’s shy cousin. Post-Covid, always invite 70 to 80 people if you know you want 40. I start with a core group of great people and expand from there; it’s all about the mix. Should you extend the invitation to plus ones? It depends. My favourites are family members — there is nothing better than someone bringing a mad auntie to the party. Sulky partners who don’t actually want to be there are my least favourite (and probably the most common).

Aimee Phillips is a DJ and creative consultant

How to fill the dancefloor: the ultimate playlist

Joshua James

Parties are a marathon and not a sprint, so be prepared. The gays are the first on the dance floor, then the girls, then the straights — so, win over the gays and you’re on to a winner. Start with disco classics, anything with a double clap. Then Missy Elliot and Mariah. With Christmas tracks, I’d recommend no more than a smattering — we’ve heard enough Jingle Bell Rock for a life time. I’ve recently been bashing out an old record I found by Hyper Go Go — Do Watcha Do (Hyper Go Go Club Mix) which is an instant dancefloor filler. My final advice: never take requests and always end on a high. My favourite closing track is Love is in the Air, it ends a night perfectly.

DJ Joshua James plays Jodie Harsh’s Feel It on Fridays and XOYO’s Pleasurehood on Saturdays

How to be the best guest ever

Miss Jason

Be organised and plan everything before you leave home. There’s nothing worse than standing around waiting for an Uber. Always arrive an hour after a party starts, or 30 minutes if it’s a big event, as you don’t want to start your night in a queue. As soon as you arrive, get a drink and change your energy straight away. Find the host before going round and saying ‘hi’ to everyone you know, and only then start to work the crowd. If you want to strike up a conversation, just smile and pay a compliment. PDA is a no, no, no at a party or an ‘event’, but it is good at a club. Don’t be a sloppy drunk and when you’re tired, go home. Do a French exit or you will bring the mood down. For dinner parties, bring a bottle of wine. Bring a gift? Why would you do that! And if things go quiet during the dinner, start telling a wild story. Games are also acceptable but no shady ones, this is not Housewives. Just play the one with names on your head — it always wins.

Miss Jason is a professional partygoer and presenter

Women! Here’s how to look fabulous

Annie Doble

Don’t wear black, as you risk being missed. With a party dress, you need something fun – it sets the night in the right way. I love techniques I haven’t seen before, that’s why I love vintage so much, and also love a bit of colour. Silvia Astore has a new design called the Silvi Dress. It’s long sleeved, with a bell shape, completely off the shoulder. Up comer Conner Ives’s amazing shawl dresses have been a hit too. You want to look like what you’re wearing could be from the past or present day. I would always say invest in something special over going to fast fashion – you’ll end up with a wardrobe full of things you love. And don’t be afraid to really throw it back. Millie Bobbie Brown was wearing my 60s Courrèges set in Paris this year, and she just looked great. I’ve launched a few pieces of my own collection – all deadstock fabrics, with Ottoman Empire inspired gold thread stitching. Margot Robbie was so in love with this tapestry dress I’m making for it, she bought my own one this summer.

Annie Doble is the founder of Annie’s Ibiza; anniesibiza.com

Men! How to get the look

Wolf Gillespie

Never have a go-to, always make it up on the spot. Dressing up is all about creating a personality for the night — the more contradictory to your everyday reality, the better. When selecting an outfit, men should think of actor Vincent Gallo. That’s the move right now. Everyone should own skinny jeans, and everyone should know about the east London brand Parabola Works.

Wolf Gillespie is a model and the son of Primal Scream’s Bobby Gillespie and stylist Katy England

The dream décor

Tatiana Kharchylava

It’s all about the lighting – it plays an essential part in creating the right atmosphere. A few dimmable uplighters or large pillar candles completely transform an ambiance of the space. Always have a theme. Use large visually impactful elements and props that deliver the ‘wow’ factor, then add smaller details that will complete the full picture. This year at Annabel’s, I chose a Christmas Carousel façade outside. For at-home affairs, timeless and classy decorative pieces never go out of style. For instance, hand-painted Christmas baubles, or elegant napkin rings add an element of sophistication and elevate the decor. I love handmade decorations, as they add a unique touch.

Tatiana Kharchylava is the Creative Director of The Birley Clubs

The only dance moves you need to know

Reece Clarke

Ideally, just let your body move naturally to the track that’s playing. If you need a bit more structure than that, I would recommend the two-step to get things started. You can then add a little head bop or some arm movements and twists to spice it up a little. A slightly more challenging step would be the heel-toe. Now I would definitely recommend practicing this one at home before hitting the dance floor… but once you have the co-ordination, it looks more impressive than it is challenging to do. There’s tutorials for these steps on YouTube – I recommend MahaloDance. And whatever happens, avoid Dirty Dancing lifts, however merry you get… And never try to do the splits. It’s not worth the potential damage to your outfit.

Reece Clarke is a Royal Ballet principal dancer

What to serve: sharing plates are the key

Jessie Ware

For intimate dinners, big sharing plates are my go-to. Put dishes on a lovely serving platter, it’ll look stunning and people can serve themselves. I love a beef brisket chilli or anything slow-cooked — it means less time stressing, and more time enjoying the party. For a cocktail party, keep it simple and go back in time. Honey and mustard cocktail sausages are a must. I also love recreating the sort of sandwiches we used to have at our kids parties. I’m here for a random setting of food, it’s chic! For anything big, I will be enjoying someone else’s cooking! I host a lot and I love it but sometimes I just want to show up have a glass of wine (or Coca-Cola!) and have a mingle.

Jessie Ware is a singer and the presenter of the Table Manners podcast

Yes, you need entertainment

Tom Rasmussen

The rule is: the bigger the party, the bigger the performance. At an intimate dinner party, inviting those who wish to do ‘a turn’ is always so chic and festive. This might be a song, a sonnet, someone’s mother doing the splits. If nobody is capable of such a thing, then throw a better party with more interesting people. Between 20 and 40, you could get away with lovely speeches, and perhaps karaoke. Weirdly, close-hand magicians are back, and I would argue chic. For fun there is always the drag girlies — but only hire a queen or a king if you can pay them properly, and if you know your guests will treat them with the reverence they deserve. Then there are whole other types of entertainment: a friend once had a facialist at a party, another had a Tarot reader. And lest we forget Christine Quinn’s Burgers and Botox bash.

Tom Rasmussen is a musician and author

The drinks to serve

Missy Flynn

Go for cocktails that can be batched and easily refilled. Begin with a seasonal spritz or a Sbagliato (a Negroni variation with sparkling wine), then easy build in the glass (ice, spirit, mixer) highballs throughout — like a Paloma with a smoked salt rim and touch of Campari. For later on, have some pre-bottled and pre-diluted short drinks, such as strong gin Martinis or Manhattans. Have a couple of bottles of Pet Nat open too, y’know just in case.

Missy Flynn is the co-founder of Soho restaurant Rita’s; ritasdining.com