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Production of England’s latest disaster sequel put on the back burner
REBOOT IS ON THE OTHER FOOT
Hollywood is beholden to the reboot, the safe bet trumping the imagination of something original. Into cinemas this month arrives an update to the 1996-tornado epic Twister, titled Twisters. How clever. And right until that moment, it seemed as if another sequel to a disaster film was in production, with Gareth Southgate’s England side ready to emulate their cataclysmic defeat by Iceland at the Euros eight years ago.
The storyboard was coming together organically. Cole Palmer was ready to be cast into the Marcus Rashford role of young hotshot sub who should’ve come on earlier. The pundits’ monologues were prepared, first on free-to-air television before the racier versions on their various podcasts. The racists were ready to post on social media disgraces. The post-game vox pops under the Gelsenkirchen night sky were planned. Southgate’s resignation would arrive in the week if not at the post-match press conference, with Lee Carsley’s coronation taking place before the next assignment. Rishi Sunak then urging the nation to get behind Wales for the rest of the tournament.
And then the twist: hey, Jude. It had to be Bellingham, as he intimated himself when mouthing “who else?” after his 95th-minute scissor kick. Not just because of his outrageous talent, but because he actually possesses the ingenuity to write new material, not just a rehash of the same old miserable English exit from a major tournament, prolonging the years of hurt for the men. This is the kid megastar who had his shirt number retired by Birmingham City, who rejected the advances of the Premier League, who suddenly became a false nine in his first season at Real Madrid on the way to Big Cup glory. He decided, as Marc Guéhi flicked the ball on, not to chest it for a first touch of control, but for the trickiest option imaginable. Thus, with a subsequent extra-time winner from Harry Kane, Bellingham’s non-conformity had led England to their fourth consecutive quarter-final.
Does this change the story or simply delay the doom? The post-match inquest may still be on the way. We could still have Declan Rice, Phil Foden and Kyle Walker on Sky Sports €uropean $uper £eague punditry duties in 16 years’ time, wondering why their Golden Generation weren’t able to lift a trophy. It could just be that Keir Starmer’s the one addressing the nation, reminding everyone that while the boys did their best, he too, in case you haven’t heard before, really, really loves football. For now at least, Bellingham’s audacity has granted the dreamers another few days.
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QUOTE OF THE DAY
“VAR is fantastic but we don’t know how to use it probably. Decisions are always taken by, let’s say, the same kind of people; they sit there with 10 screens, they have to analyse everything, but from one match to the other they don’t give the same decisions. That is why the players don’t understand it any more, staff don’t know any more, coaches don’t. VAR is great but until we know how to use it properly maybe we have to wait until we use it again” – Georgia coach W1lly Sagnol laments the decision to allow Spain’s equaliser before they went on to cap a furious comeback 4-1 and set up a mouthwatering date with Germany on Friday in the quarter-finals.
EURO 2024 DAILY LETTERS
I happened to watch the clip of a recent performance by a popular English group whose cold play divides opinions. In a fashion similar to the countless criticisms aimed at Gareth Southgate, thousands of fans sang in unison about how they would try to Fix You. Here’s to a bone-igniting quarter-final now” – Peter Oh.
A doff of the cap to the England team for consistently proving throughout this tournament that Napoleon (emperor of France and king of Italy, not the cognac) was right and that it is better to be lucky than good. And it all worked out well for him. Oh …” – Noble Francis.
Send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s letter o’ the day winner is … Peter Oh, who wins a copy of Euro Summits: The Story of the Uefa European Championships 1960 to 2016, by Pitch Publishing. Visit their bookshop here. Terms and conditions for our competitions can be viewed here.
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