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Very Specific Football Question No.47: Who will have the last laugh, Big Sam or Chico Flores?

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Chico Flores is a deeply petty individual. For three years he has been holding a grudge against a man who once laughed loudly in his face, and this week he finally got the chance for revenge.

The Spanish defender greeted his nemesis Sam Allardyce’s removal as England manager by tweeting some tears of joy emojis, followed by a triumphant ‘thug life’ meme celebrating the duo’s rivalry. He then settled back into the internet with a satisfied grin.

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As rivalries go, this is one of football’s bitterest and most unusual – unique in that the battle is taking place purely through the medium of laughter.

It was Allardyce who struck first, back in October 2013, when he unleashed a powerful laugh right into Chico’s face during a match between West Ham and Swansea at the Liberty Stadium.

The Spanish defender had invoked the manager’s sarcastic mirth by rolling around in apparent agony after a seemingly innocuous tussle with the late West Ham striker, Carlton Cole.

“Flores is over-exaggerating, which is generally the norm for him unfortunately,” Allardyce said at the time.

TV replays validated the manager’s claim and he was hailed as a hero for rallying against those fancy foreign play-actors in such entertaining style.


And that could have been the end of it, but Flores evidently did not enjoy being ridiculed.

That evening, after watching Match of the Day, he carved a tattoo into his right bicep reading ‘Never Forget’, with Big Sam’s chuckling visage embroidered underneath. And even if he didn’t actually do that, the moment was imprinted on his mind.

But in the ensuing months and years, the two men’s professional lives have veered in opposite directions.

While Allardyce’s career reached its glorious zenith with a miraculous rescue of Sunderland’s Premier League status followed by the appointment to his “dream job” of England manager, Flores left Swansea at the end of that season and headed deep into football’s nether regions.

Since 2014, Flores has been turning out for the Qatar Stars League outfit Lekhwiya SC, playing to crowds of (a maximum of) 12,000. The club don’t have many fans because they were only formed in 2009 by a member of the royal family.

Flores doesn’t care about that though because he’s got a Ferrari, which he regularly posts photos of on social media, along with other signs of the fantastical wealth he has acquired since leaving South Wales for the Middle East.

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Which is very nice, but it does leave the impression that the former Genoa and Mallorca centre-back has sold out, rather. He is still only 29 years old, but has evidently decided that he’d rather drive a nice car then play any meaningful football.

Indeed, it’s ironic that Flores is so averse to other people making him look silly because he does such a thorough job of it himself with his Twitter and Instagram posts.

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So while Flores has undoubtedly struck a crucial blow in his duel with Allardyce, the 61-year-old need only get a new job in the Premier League and he will once again hold the upper hand in life.

Or maybe Big Sam will just give up and slope off to the Qatari league too. That would at least be one way to make sure he gets his £400,000.

Follow @darlingkevin on Twitter

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